You won’t give up, if you really want something.

Internet update: still nothing. Neighbours still haven’t noticed my continuous camping outside of their house. But good news, I finally have my internet data back on my phone… but I need to learn from my mistakes and not use it all up in one week. Terrified of this months cell phone bill…

I have awesome news! I have been accepted to the Masters that I have been trying to get since August 2014. Since the first email I sent out, I went through high’s and low’s. At first I was told that “you are a great researcher, I am really interested in having you, I’ve heard only great things about you…. BUT I don’t think I’ll have the money to support you”. When I want something I will not give up. So we kept emailing back and forth with my hopeful-future-supervisor, only sharing good news with each other about how maybe there might be an opportunity, etc etc. However, in November I get the dreaded “I apologize but I definitely won’t have money to support a project for any future students”. NOOOOOOOOO. Not only did my heart break (I am so in love with this research, interestingly enough it’s what I like to read up on in my spare time, think of projects here and there, and alone in my room question other works on this topic), but I was also completely screwed because by November I hadn’t applied anywhere else…. This supervisor, this school, was my first and only choice that I really wanted to pursue.

Like I said I don’t take no for an answer, so I set up an interview with this professor. In person he can see my passion, my determination, and my willingness to do whatever I can, to find the money and work in this lab, I just needed some help that was all.

In December was when I had the interview (conveniently it was because I was in Canada for the month, and also travelled to the University city). We talked about how awesome it would be to work together, but how unfortunate it is to be a biologist at this time in Canada…. You know funding cuts, environmental space shut-downs, the refusal to take scientific research into consideration… yes clearly all logical choices that are only for the good of science… Anyways, I really admire this professor for still showing me around, taking the time to talk to me about my interests, and suggest other professors I could apply to. I didn’t go into the interview with an expectation of hearing “we found a secret treasure that can support all research everywhere!”… Although it would have been nice.

So after returning back to France, guess what email I receive in the beginning of February “Anastasia there is a slight chance we might be able to take you on! I’ll let you know soon” WHHHHAAATTT!! How exciting! Well a month had passed and nothing… Although the silly human that I am I still had so much hope that I’d soon hear good news. So I took things into my own hands and contacted the professor with a simple “Any update?” Turns out he had some email problems and had already sent out my “good news” email!

So after all the struggle, all the stress, and all the support from my friends and family I can proudly say I will be starting a Masters program at my number one choice university, researching topics that I’ve been passionate about since second year of University! YES!

Some Disclamers:

Email’s are not word for word… more like really paraphrased.

No I will not mention where I am going and who I am working with on a public blog that is viewed around the world (seriously my 2^nd highest country to view this blog is Ireland… that’s so awesome, just really unexpected) because that is unprofessional and irresponsible.

All in all, if you want something DO NOT GIVE UP… if you do, then you clearly did not want it that badly in the first place.

Back to France blogging next post, I did not have much to write about this week anyways other than how I’ve painted, got motion sickness from the swings, and found a dead rat that I then had to maneuver into the bushes with a stick. So not so interesting.

Hey I’ll fix the Internet for you!

Not! Wtf man… we waited a week and a half for a guy from the company to come in, look at the damn thing for 20 minutes only to come to the conclusion he can’t fix it… well buddy, looks like I can do your job too… how much do they pay you to tell people you can’t do anything?

Anyways, still internet-less, but at least the neighbours are so lovely to let me use theirs. However, being the person that I am I don’t want to bother them on a daily basis… so sometimes I just stand in front of their house with my cell phone (probably looking likes a freakishly suspicious weirdo…) trying to get some internet access to let my family and boyfriend know I am still alive…

So this past weekend I took a long road trip to Metz (north of France; right next to Luxembourg). It was about a 4-hour drive through villages and rivers (so a much nicer drive than on the straight, boring highways of Ontario). It was lovely to see a friendly and familiar face here in France (and have a person to share some of the conflicts that I may have run in to – i.e the constant staring from French people whether you are a weird looking human or not… nobody discreetly stares… they just do and you know it, and even if you stare back right into the eyes, they don’t care, they’ll continue staring…). We decided to go to the Vosges mountains to try/ learn snowboarding. While on my first try I was a bit nervous and scared, I seemed to have gotten the hang of it by the end. And interestingly enough, I think I prefer it to skiing… I mean it’s just so much easier! 

The trip was quite entertaining as well, we happened to lose gas on the way up the mountain at which point we had to neutral it back down to the village to the first (and most likely, only) gas station. For the most part of the weekend we ate, drank, and caught up on lives in France, which was just so nice and relaxing compared to the energetic environment am I almost always surrounded by at my host families house.

Anyways that is all for now, I should probably leave the neighbours house… who knows how long the Internet will be out… I don’t want to overstay my welcome/ get on their nerves with my constant coming over. Back to the front yard I go… kidding… kind of.

How to survive an internet apocalypse

So for the past week (and several days to follow) the internet in our house has been busted... No idea what, and no person can fix it... Until wednesday, which is 2 more days in the future (oh and this is only being hopeful, you never know if it will actually be fixed). Then also, as my luck would have it, my cellular data has reached it's limit.. 15 days before my month is over!!! a;kdhfjaiuhefkawfehvw!! So yeah, when I say no internet, I mean none.

So how do you survive an internet apocalypse?

1. Read - I've finished almost 2 books already... internet has only been out for a week and a half.
2. Candy crush - I'm in the 100's for levels...
3. Pray to god you have something on your harddrive - I didn't. All I had was supernatural (which is more of a thriller and not something I want to watch continuously) and Rome - a show about ancient Rome about Caesar and stuff... mostly it's just a lot of naked people, sex scenes, and blood (think Game of Thrones), and spoiler... Caesar gets stabbed.
4. Have awesome friends who would let you use their internet.
5. Go to Paris - that is if you are lucky enough to live in France, if not (hah sucker), then go to some other city with internet cafés and McDonalds'.
6. Be lucky enough to have your kids you work with on vacation! (no there is no sarcasm intended here) I loved spending the week with my girls! We spent all this time outside, playing, and just being hyper children (yes me included). I don't think I say this enough, but gosh I am so lucky to have such wonderful and funny girls (kind of makes 'work' no longer work, and more play - literally)!
7. Go out with friends - whether it be forests or drinking.
8. Complete things off of your Paris museum bucket list.

I miss cats.. There was a random kitty sleeping in Shakespeare and Company.

Malheureusement we had to say goodbye to one of our friends this past week. Although we did have a wonderful last week. After the usual goodbye dinner, we of course had to go out in Paris one last time. After getting a hotel in one of the sketchiest areas of Paris we first went out for food and to buy alcohol for the night to come. After realizing that we could not drink a whole bottle of gin we decided to go for the mickey of absolute vodka. The store clerk clearly felt that would not be enough and just decided to put in a second bottle of absolute vodka for absolutely free.... followed by a "have a good night".... only. in. Paris.

After our mini-pre in the hotel room we headed out to the African club. While cover is "by-donation" drinks are freakishly expensive (12 euros for a cocktail!). I ended up having a drink... because I girl can't say no when a man insists on buying you a 12 euro drink. Afterwards we were invited to a party by these gentlemen. We were easily convinced with "we've got lots of alcohol". When we got there it was more of a smoke weed, get drunk with a 7 dudes... we quickly left. But all in all, it was a great way to say goodbye to a lovely friend made in France! Who will impart her music wisdom on me now…

Well off to my cave now… Time if finishing up at the anti cafe (speaking off if you are ever in Paris you must visit this place. 4 euros for an hour of internet, snacks, and all sort of cold and hot drinks).

The alarm clock is possessed.

This past weekend I finally climbed the Eiffel Tower. I know shocking, I spent 4 months in France and only looked at the tower from the ground. My friend and I took the stares [also what kind of stupid spelling mistake is this?? Clearly I meant "stairs". I don't think I've ever tried climbing stares...) (cause we are so active! [ i.e we we're too cheap to pay 10 euros for the elevator, and would rather pay 4 to climb the stairs]). We happened to go at the perfect time too, an hour or so before 18:00, which meant we got to see Paris in the daylight, the Eiffel Tower light up, and Paris at night.

Yes there is a skating rink on the Eiffel Tower

This was one of the scariest things I did [keep in mind I am afraid of heights and there was a 40-year-old man who would refuse to go on the glass floor, so clearly I have more balls then him]

And then I saw that the glass floor at the Eiffel Tower breaks… I am never stepping on it again.

I am getting better at these panoramic shots

It gets all sparkly.

I am going to go back a little in time here. But before we went to the Eiffel Tower we checked out some archives museum…. yes it is as boring as it sounds.

There were way too many people, all the seats we're taken, had to sit in the back.

I went over the 'red tape' for this photo. After we took it, my friend pointed out a camera pointing at this very desk and chair… I was scared I'd get kicked out the rest of our visit. 

The rest of this week has been... interesting.

Tuesday and Wednesday I was in Paris meeting so many new people, it was lovely. Tuesday night, my friend and I went out for drinks in Paris with a whole bunch of other girls, and Wednesday I went to a "french conversation meetup" where I again met some fascinating people, and realized my french is not that horrible.

All thanks to Lina for the photo. This bar served popcorn and candy for 'free snacks', how awesome??!

However, the week with the girls has been up and down. Monday, the older one stayed home because she had a bad sleep and needed to sleep in more. Her little sister, obviously, had a tantrum because she wanted to stay home too. What made matters worse is how the big sister kept coming downstairs, almost like taunting the little sister about the fact that she doesn't get to go to school in for the morning. That shit doesn't fly with me, so I told her, if she's at home to rest, then she can rest in bed as she is supposed to, which worked very well.

Then for the last two days of the week I had the girls for lunch: big girl and her friends Thursday, and little one today. I'm starting to dislike it more and more when the big girls come for lunch... it's pretty much a good way to get a headache for 2 hours as all they do is scream and act like theres 10 of them... When the little ones come home for lunch it is way calmer, we have some interesting conversations for lunch, and they clean up after themselves!

Then, apparently someone had taken out the vacuum bag and never put in a new one, and just closed the vacuum up. I assume you can guess what happened then... Obviously the blame fell on the young au pair who doesn't even know how to open the damn lid of the vacuum [let alone take out the bag], but if the cleaning lady says it wasn't her... What kind of an idiot takes out the vacuum bag and doesn't put a new one in and then blames the au pair!

I really will be needing a drink tonight.

But overall the week has been really great, I am so happy to have met so many people in such a short amount of time! And overall the girls have been really good for the mornings (that's the hardest time of the day, who can blame them!)

Oh yes, and about the possessed part, last night I was going to sleep, and while I was in my "almost asleep phase" my alarm clock radio thing next to my bed just turns on... It gave me a mild heart attack as all I could hear was "shhhhshhhshhhshhhh" really loud. I pressed all the buttons on the alarm clock and nothing would stop it (yes i even tried the volume button). Now considering I was in half a dream state already, I started to freak out that some possessed being was going to come out of my closet or something and warn me about the terrible future. I started panicking and trying to find the cord that would let me turn the devil thing off, but I had this horrible thought that what if I unplugged the thing and it still wouldn't stop... then screw France, I'm going home. After I had turned it off, I could not go back to sleep for another hour after this trauma! The thing is never going to be plugged in again...

Jet-lagged

Nothing beats a kicking and crying devil baby like last time on the plane, but this time I just could not sleep no matter how tired I was. I was just very uncomfortable. But I did meet a lovely asian man who sat beside me, as well as a cool American girl in the airport which made the wait much more bearable.

It also took me about an hour to get my luggage... After the first two rounds of luggage (each 20 minutes apart) I started to have a panic attack (not really, but used her for enthusiasm) that my luggage was gone, finito, never to be seen again. And then I saw it, the tiny (yes I took the smallest suitcase this time around), grey, plaid suitcase on the TV and out it came! I then went to meet Papi (grandpa) to pick me up and drive me home.

He speaks french 99.9% of the time but is very proud of the handful of words he knows in English. So a lot of the time I just say "Oui" or "ooh" when I don't understand what he says, because there is just really no way of me understanding some of his words without a dictionary (he tries, and to avoid awkward minutes of me still not understand, I just say "ok" and nod).

Once I got home, I pretty much immediately passed out... for 5-6 hours... I woke up about 3 times and would fall asleep each time mid-text (I kept waking up with my phone in my hand and being a bit confused, until I remembered what I was trying to do - trying to text Den den and my mom that i've finally woke up... which was false 2/3 times). I woke up at 8:30pm which was just in time for everyone to be home, and dinner to be served.

Luckily the girls stayed at their grandparents Tuesday-Wednesday so I had the night and morning off.

After my long "nap" I could only go back to sleep at 2:30am, and then slept till noon the next day - don't you just love jet-lag.

I got to see the girls in the evening when I was picking them up with my host mom. They were so happy and excited to see me!! I felt so much love, it was really wonderful. I had day dreams of them hating the fact that I came, or being indifferent to the fact that I am here. But they weren't! And from the looks of it they really enjoyed my presents for them.

Well all is good so far. Tomorrow I just right into work, with a full day's of work, should be fun!

Bonne nuit et bisous!

DISCO!

I have just been informed that I cannot go downstairs to my room as apparently I am needed by my mother... she's been on the phone for an hour, but apparently is "almost done".. conversation doesn't sound done to me! So I guess I may as well start my blog here, and hopefully [preferably within this hour] I can migrate downstairs to my room. Apparently I was needed to urgently show how to drag a file onto a device... An action that I have demonstrated several times, on several devices...

Look at me writing about events that have occurred within the week! Tis quite an accomplishment. On Monday I took a trip back to my university town. I love revisiting cities that have some of my fondest memories. As soon as I arrived I was greeted by Mus, my wonderful friend and host for the next couple of days. Then I went to visit my old professor for some words of wisdom about future plans and just simple chats about life. I am embarrassed to admit that he used to intimidate me so much when I first took classes from him. It always made me nervous to come for help and I just felt stupid talking to him. But after working a year with the man, in the field and in the lab, as well as screwing up several times, in the field and in the lab, I guess you just realize you are a human who makes mistakes, and sometimes you must ask for help.

On my way to Starbucks (it was the only place that was close by with internet; I had to stay in contact with other humans!) from the lab I bumped into old friends along the university streets. So rather than taking 5 minutes to walk to Starbucks, it took me a good hour. I loved it! Catching up with different people, learning of their new lives, sharing my own, it really makes you nostalgic.

After grabbing dinner, and meeting many new people at the caf, Mus and I, as well as two other girls, headed out to the Bahamas concert. While I only recently started listening to them (knowing I was going to see them live soon), I really did enjoy the concert. The band has a very "feel-good" vibe. Although the four of us we're enjoying soft-core porn at the same time... as there were [presumably] 2 first or second-year couples who were having a make-out contest between each other. I don't know why the music got them so horny... it really wasn't that kind of music. After enjoying two shows simultaneously, we headed out to our university pub to enjoy... wait for it... Caesars! A wonderful, tomato-ee drink, that is never served in France.

Next day I had to get up early for my interview with another professor that I admire. The interview went quite well, and if things work out in my favour I will be moving back to this lovely city. The interview took about 2 hours, as I chatted to everyone in the lab, as well as got shown the entire lab and its adjacent components. I then left to go 2 floors up to join my previous lab's meeting and then later to go have lunch with my old lab-mate to catch up on the lab drama and bio-gossip (yes we have cool lives as biologists).

My trip ended with Mus and I going to Disco Bingo at the Grad Club [where we again enjoyed the wonderful lushy redness that is the Caesar] and played some bingo.  Mus succeeded in retrieving a prize bag due to her excellent black-out/marker/bingo skills, while I kept winning condoms. Yes you heard correct, all I won the whole night we're condoms, I was then known as "condom-girl". I ended up giving them away, as really I am the last person that would be using them, so I figured I'd do someone else the favour of not contracting STD or the parasite that is a human baby (biologically speaking of course - but actually being pregnant sucks so I've heard). Oh the way I kept winning the condoms was I had to say "Disco" whenever "O-69" was called - I know terribly difficult, but hey at least I won something, even though I didn't necessarily walk out with my 'prizes'.

Well  I believe it is time to stop the blogpost at its high-point of winning and condoms, so I will leave you with the new Maroon 5 video (if you have not yet noticed, I really like this band). It is such a sweet concept where the band simply crashes strangers' weddings!

I will also be sleeping with 2 cats by my side, things can really not get any better.

New Years posts to come soon!

Oh yes, I forgot to mention, this is how I travelled back home on Wednesday morning:

The zipper on my boot broke, and well, I can't go home bare-foot, so Mus and I improvised.. I think I set up a cool new fashion statement.

Fact: I hate airports.

Specifically the Toronto Pearson one. I think almost every time I have been there I have cried [*cough* bawled my eyes out until I am red in the face]. They might as well start greeting me with boxes of tissues at the "departure" level.

I haven't written in all this time as I have been busy with actual human beings, and I rarely opened my computer (expect to download and stream shows that I can then watch at home... thanks to farmer-land-type internet that is extra slow and very limited at my parents').

I will write a big blog post (or several) about the past 2 weeks that Den den and I have lived through, which was quite fun.

I guess it is also common for people to post their new years resolutions? Well I can already say I've failed, I wanted to do the "take a picture everyday project", but I realized I had failed by January 2nd.. So perhaps I will start with a "picture a week" [yes I know I have failed that too, but my resolutions don't start Jan 1st, I'm on vacation!]

At this moment I am really not looking forward to going back to France. First, all the violence that is occurring, then well I just want to finally stop living in a long-distance relationship! God damn, it sucks so much!

So somber post today, but I'll work on it.

If anyone wants to follow these deceivingly titled "photo's of the day/week" of mine you are welcome to follow me on Instagram @Itsstasi.